Familiar Banter
by purpleatheist
Summary: Josh and Sam talk. Yep, just talk. Slash.


Title: Familiar Banter  
Author: purpleatheist (cobbsc@ncssm.edu)  
Rating: PG for a few language problems  
Keywords/Pairing: Slash, Josh/Sam  
Disclaimer: I do not own any Wing Wing characters. Otherwise, this wouldn't be fanfiction, would it?  
Author's notes: Small spoliers for The Stackhouse Filibuster. This was a late-night, 20 minute thing. Criticism welcome, flames used for entertainment purposes.  
  
  
  
"I'm going to kill you, Sam."  
  
"Why?"  
  
"Because you interrupted my meeting and ate a banana."  
  
"Oh." There was a long pause. "Are you mad because I interrupted the meeting or because I ate the banana? Because I don't think I really interrupted the meeting seeing as I ended up contributing a great deal to the meeting, work-wise."  
  
"Sam, you came into my office in the middle of a meeting and got fruit. Can you not get fruit from someone else's office? Or, God forbid, the actual cafeteria?"  
  
Sam shrugged. "So I wanted to see you."  
  
"Couldn't you have waited until after the meeting to eat the damn banana?"  
  
"Yes, but it wouldn't have been near as much fun."  
  
Josh gave a tortured sigh. "You just love doing that to me, don't you?"  
  
"Yeah, I think I'm going pro. You know, on a world tour. 'See the famous Sam Seaborne, in his miraculous acts of considerable torture against the poor, suffering Josh Lyman!' Wouldn't that be entertaining, Josh?"  
  
"You can't steal my lines like that, but, hell, yeah. I'd come. Just to show that you can't really torture me."  
  
"I can, too. And your lines are definitely fair game for me."  
  
"No you can't."  
  
"Yes I can."  
  
"No you can't, Sam. I am completely immune to all forms Sam-torture."  
  
"Then why are you going to kill me for torturing you?"  
  
"I'm not going to kill you for torturing me. I'm going to kill me because you interrupted my meeting and ate a banana."  
  
"The article's a bit indefinite there, Josh. Do you mean you're killing me for interrupting the meeting and eating the banana, as two separate acts for which I must be put to death, or do you mean you're killing me for interrupting your meeting to eat a banana? I think that a distinction must be made."  
  
Josh gave another tortured sigh. "See, I'm torturing you, aren't I?"  
  
"No."  
  
"Yes I am."  
  
"No, you're not."  
  
"I'm right, though."  
  
"No, Sam, you're not right. You're just argumentative."  
  
"Oh. Is there a difference?"  
  
"Yes. A clear one."  
  
"Because I never argue unless I'm right."  
  
"That's a lie. You don't care why you're arguing, as long as there's an argument involved."  
  
"Yeah, but I'm still always right."  
  
"You are not."  
  
"I am, too."  
  
"Not in this case. Because semantics are irrelevant in this case. Whether I kill you once or twice, you're still dead."  
  
"Yes, but if you killed me once and messed up, I'd still be alive, where as if you killed me twice, you'd have a far less chance of failure."  
  
"Yet I used the clear verb kill rather than something less definite such as attempt to kill. Saying kill clearly indicates that death, your death, will be involved."  
  
"Oh."  
  
"Ha. I won the argument."  
  
"No you didn't. I just got sick of the argument."  
  
"Clearly meaning that I won, by default."  
  
"Nope. It's a stalemate."  
  
"You're impossible."  
  
Sam smiled. "I know."  
  
"Is Toby really your favorite writer?"  
  
"Yeah."  
  
"He's pretty good."  
  
"Yeah."  
  
"Sam?"  
  
"Yeah?"  
  
"You're my favorite writer."  
  
"Really?"  
  
"Really."  
  
"Cool."  
  
Josh laughed. "Sam, only you would say 'cool' in response to that comment."  
  
"I'm just special that way."  
  
"I think maybe Senator Stackhouse is my hero."  
  
"Mine, too."  
  
"That was amazing, what he did today."  
  
"It really was. And to have so many rally behind him…"  
  
"Democracy worked today, Sam."  
  
"It was wonderful, wasn't it? To see it in action, the way it was intended?"  
  
"It really was. To see it used to help instead of to hurt. Gives you kind of chill to know you're part of such a…a…"  
  
"A magnificent procedure?"  
  
"Not what I was thinking of, but good enough."  
  
"Mmm."  
  
"Sam?"  
  
"Yeah, Josh?"  
  
"I think that watching that filibuster for that long was better than having Mike Piazza call me 'dude'.  
  
"Think so?"  
  
"Yeah. I don't think even that would give me quite the same rush."  
  
"Josh?"  
  
"Yeah?"  
  
"Are you still going to kill me?"  
  
"Mmmm…" He smiled as Sam snuggled closer to him. "I guess not."  
  
"Josh?"  
  
"Yeah, Sam?"  
  
"I'm glad I'm here. Instead of on vacation."  
  
"Me, too."  
  
"Josh?"  
  
"Yes, Sam?"  
  
"I love you."  
  
"I love you too, Sam." Josh put his arm around Sam and pulled him closer in the bed, and kissed him softly.  
  
"It's really late at night. I think maybe I'll go to sleep, now."  
  
"Actually it's really early in the morning."  
  
"Whatever."  
  
Josh smiled against Sam's neck. "What?"  
  
"You didn't argue."  
  
"I told you, I only argue when I'm right."  
  
"You're saying I was right?"  
  
Sam sighed. "Good night, Josh."  
  
"Night, love."  
  
The drifted off to sleep in silence.  



End file.
